All in the Family

Sometimes a person’s words just stay with you. I am still thinking about a comment I overheard at Parents’ Weekend about how important parents are in their student finding a way to college and being successful. The speaker said that students need support to get here and need ongoing support to excel at Lynchburg College. You don’t have to be here long or talk to many of our students to realize that some come from helpful supportive families, but others do not. Some have two parents who love them and both check in regularly without meddling. Some have one parent. Some have a grandmother who is responsible for nurturing a desire for a college degree or a foster parent who first challenged our student about the value of a college education. Occasionally a parent is even a negative influence, and many students are estranged from one of their parents.  It’s just the way our community and are world are.

I come from a “broken-home,” but was lucky enough that both parents supported me even if they fought a lot about the ways that support would be portioned out. I am a single parent who raises a daughter, born in this modern world of artificial insemination, in a three generational home. My mother moved in with me to take care of my daughter while I am working. And if you haven’t seen me in a few weeks, I am expecting another baby before Spring Break! I firmly believe that families are what they are and that you should define family in the way it works for you. That may or may or not include the people who are biologically related to you.

I hope you had a great Parents and Family weekend. For students, if your parents were here, I hope you had fun showing them around campus and introducing them to professors and the places you now call home. I hope they are proud of you and your work here at LC and that they are at a place where they can let you grow up, but still help with the laundry. If your parents didn’t come this weekend, I hope you were able to get your roommate’s parents to take you out to dinner or to get out with friends. If it was a rough weekend for you, I hope that you can find some new family here at LC, and people who can be proud of you for who you really are. For faculty and staff, I hope you got some insight into some of our student’s families–both the ones who are supportive and the ones who are less helpful. Faculty and staff make the difference here for our students who have less supportive families in big and small ways.

So I am thinking a lot about families this week. We have students, faculty and staff who have recently received news of the death of grandparents and parents in the past weeks. We have other students, faculty and staff whose parents have significant health issues, who have children about whom they worry and families who need their attention. Our community is a strong one, but we also miss the pain under the surface sometimes. I invite you in this week to reflect on the joys and celebrations of your family and to cherish your time with them. Overlook the shortcomings you can and forgive those that weigh you down.  Invite supportive friends to be your family when your biological family is less helpful and reach out to those who have experienced loss.

Blessings,

Stephanie